On and Off and On!

Hola!
College started yesterday…well not officially but kinda yes! It has started…
Well the shocking news of this semester was that our principal got changed…its our physics professor who is going to serve as our principal now onwards…
Sports are like, in, this season…I guess…so my college has sports day going on…
I like to play sports but I amnt a good player…See if u have read my previous blogs you might have known by now that I love to do a lot of things but I am good at nothing….

Yesterday at college I went to sign on my attendance sheet…that’s it…all lectures were canceled due to sports day….
I always thought that my class in college sucks…it does but for a change I kinda enjoyed yesterday….we, I mean most of my classmates, both girls and boys….we played PIIT musical something….okay so…everyone got a chance to sing songs and it was fun…we were singing the cheapest songs on this planet….its fun, sometimes, seriously….
So we were kicked out by some BMS professor and hence forth…no singing….
We went to play hide and seek…damn fun….i was becoming the person who finds everyone who hides, all the time…like in a row 5 times…everyone on the architecture wing in the old canteen were laughing at me…but as if I care….hehehe…im so good at being awful at everything…
We played for long…again got kicked by some other professor…trust me it was a scene…everyone’s ID card was in danger…we ran outta the college and dashed ourselves into a car and my friend drove all the girls to the nearest park..guys were on foot….it was awesome…we played chain-chain…and I don’t suck at it trust me....ehehhahaha…then after halftime we played kho-kho…Oh! Man I was loving every moment playing at the park….then we had a discussion about our band….i don’t think its ever going to exist but yea everyone does…anyways…Later on we all went to watch my friends play cricket…you know what, I love to go and cheer my friends in whatever they do…be it in sports, debate, writings, gig, paintings or whatever…I always go to cheer them…I love my friends and I feel good to have such friends who participate in so many things….it was fun to watch everyone play…..i know girls are not much into sports but the ones who try are the real heroines and I love them for that…
So anyway…I found something bad rather not good enough about the popular students in my college and it wasn’t good enough to know that some of them were my friends…See, when someone says something about some of your friends, you either go against them or listen from on ear and throw it from the other….But its kinda hard to ignore when they prove you by pointing fingers and showing things live…..anyways!
Things yesterday with my best friend was bad for me…she asked me to do something which I always try to do but fail in doing….she counted on my myself respect…so I had to have my self-respect and do what she said…coz she wasn’t wrong.
That was so yesterday…and here the song continues….
Your So yesterday…so yesterday…im just a bird that’s already flown away…laugh it off…let it go away…come tomorrow…it will seem so yesterday so yesterday…haven’t you heard that im gonna be okay…O-K-A-Y!

So today….
I got up at 6 as usual…I woke up and figured out a disaster about myself….i thought I couldn’t play but I am just weird or something…I went to play…I went to play soccer for a team…A team I don’t know and never met…there was this guy whom ive never seen called me up and asked me to wear a red tee and play for his team…you know I don’t like embarrassing myself….but hell yea! I always go to embarrass myself….so here I wore a red tee and looked at the watch and said… “its tomorrow”….. my lazy ass was working real slow this morning…. And I was in a pathetic state of break down….
Anyways I just ran a bath and tied up my hair and whatever and got ready….
During my first semester I used to catch 6:46am local but the times have changed….i now catch a 7:9am local which comes at 7:6am….So tried hard to catch that local and as soon as I reached….i saw it passing by me…what the hell??? I waited for the next local and it was late and I left at 7:25am from my station.
I was alone in the train..i don’t usually stand next to the door especially in the mornings….its cold out here…but I don’t know…I just felt something was wrong with me…like something was missing…I passed kharghar station and some old memories came into mind…I saw that house and I tried not to look at it…I just don’t know…it felt like last February, when we all were preparing for our boards and everything before and after just flashed back to back during the whole journey…I felt alone for a while…like something could have held me back….It was cold…the air around me was chilling cold…I almost felt numb…I should have gone inside but I wanted to become numb and the pain…standing at the door I just wished that the pain I was facing could go away on its own or by something or someone…I felt empty, rather hollow and I could see everything passing through me…like the fresh and cold air…this feeling just doesn’t go away…it come again and again and haunts me, I don’t know why…I wish this feeling could just go away…but I guess nothings magical…so anyway…I watched people jogging, people taking their dogs for long walk, mother holding hands of her cute little daughter to leave her to school, old people playing with a tennis ball, tall grass, a small river and lots of under construction buildings…I don’t know I just felt like one of those under constructed buildings and in no time I read PANVEL in bold …I reached by 7:40am and saw my friends waiting for me…no one rushed to the college…no one wants to go anyway…I sat for chemistry lecture….BTW..a good news…my class has shifted from 3rd floor to 2nd floor…I am SO loving it! Yea yea!
So anyway…later on I went to the field and a guy called me…then he made me meet my team mates….they were all F.E students but I haven’t seen any of them before for sure….So our match was the first one…
In my college there is a rule that a girl should play for 2 mins in both the halves of the match and I went to play for 2 mins….my team mates were really nice…I liked them…my teams name was DAVID something…everyone says that this named guy was the biggest chain smoker in the world….anyways…as if I know…I played for the first half and second half….my team lost….but still I loved my team…I was asked by 3 more teams to play for them…for 2 mins….i don’t know what I was thinking…I just went…A big embarrassing day it was for me….but I don’t know….i still don’t feel embarrassed…like…I should…but I don’t…I wanted to play…I played…I don’t care even if I suck at it…I just wanted play…coz I just felt like….i enjoyed I donoo what…but I just did…I wish there were no spectators…
I guess I have got AIDS…I know sounds like what???....its like people from my college were plucking/getting/todofying coconuts from the trees of our college…I love to talk to anyone….i just need someone to talk to…I asked him if he could share coconuts with me…he got a piece of the inner creamy layer of the coconut for me and i had it…Later my friend made me see his hand and it was bleeding…like a small cut was there…now if he has AIDS then I have it too… 
Later on I saw couple of matches and it was fun….i saw tug of war between the college staff….it was hilarious….just made my day….
Treat in the canteen from cutest looking girl today coz she got like…almost got her license…Again I went to see matches…I met my school friend…we were in the same class in 10th and later in 11th and 12th he took commerce but still the same school bus made us stay in touch….So I watched an amazing game called actual match with the best team of Mumbai and it was fun..i even found him some girls he would like to date and guess what….he liked one and the story continues…I SO love finding guys, girlfriends…it was fun with him…it was like back during the school days…the same fun…hes still the same…just too cool…we had lodsa fun….

Later I caught 1 something local and I so loved today…. Like today in the college…
Later I went into a local and saw a female…she was very old….like running in her 80’s I guess…her hands were rigid and of weird shape…she was all dirty…torn clothes and tangled hair…she needed help and she was begging…she just had this weird eyes which wanted to say so many things…ive never noticed so much about someone but she surely was a different one…she looked as if she had not had food since long…she didn’t even have enough clothes to cover her breast and I felt really bad for…I don’t like people suffering…I just got up and got down from the train…I don’t know what went wrong…but something surely did…

I don’t know whats wrong with me…nowadays I just go on and off like a switch…I go real high and then real low…I don’t know…im just so not consistent…there are a million reasons behind this mood change of mine…I just don’t wanna sit and sort things out…I guess I am trying to run away from them…I always try to take harsh and hard steps but the situation puts me into such conditions that I fail to imply them…I just hope everything goes okay with me…

Just wanna say…
Okay!